Sleep

Most of the time my sleep is limited to a hour or so before my arms wake me up from sleeping on their own, which they seem to get  better and at at all the time. I fell down a auxiliary pump room shaft on a floating dry dock when I was 19 years old pulling my arms out of their joints and stretching the muscles, ligaments and ripping the glands that lubricate the joints. Since then sleeping as been a problem.

In addition I have two dogs and a husband to share a king sized mattress with and for some reason everyone always ends up on my side of the bed, literally. Sleep and rest are very important to a HSP and a person with anxiety. It allows for the rest of nerves, and rest our bodies need to stay as healthy as we can.

Other factors also interfere with that sleep. Things like happenings of the day like drama. I have learned a very important, and probably life saving lesson this year in that getting involved in others drama is not worth the grief. Some people are born I think to just stir the pot, challenge the nervous system. I have learned you just can not worry about them, what they think, what they are up to or why. I had someone tell me once that being upset and angry at someone hurts no one but you. Why? because there is a pretty good chance they do not even know, or care that you are upset with them, and as they are going about their day they are not thinking about you and getting all worked up so why should you give them you valuable thoughts or energy? Family drama is the worst. It has taken much out of me, but I have learned that unless someone is dying its best to walk away because no matter how right you are, you will be wrong. It can really suck to see what is coming down the road, try to explain, warn and being told you do not know what your talking about. Its just not worth it. Walk away, no, …..run!

Because of the HSP trait we tend to be the people who want to help, help to a fault. Another lesson I learned this past year was that people will not only accept that help, but come to expect it, like it is owed to them probably more unconsciously than intentional, but the lesson here is that when it starts to drain you one needs to learn to say no. Its alright to be a helper, until it starts to hurt you.

For many years my sleep has been hampered by the negative drama energy of others. Each night it gets a little better, and there are still totally sleepless nights, but it is because of something going on in my life, not someones else’s, or how they feel, or think or perceive me. When they finally put me in the ground there will about 20 years where someone will remember who I am, after that I will be nothing more than a headstone with all the others so what that says to me is that none of it really matters does it?

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